Tag Archive | arguing

How to Fight to Win

by Linda Irene

Life is not without its relationship problems. When people are upset it is usually because they do not feel they are getting what they want. Many times we assume the other person should know, but for clarity’s sake, make your requests known, clearly.

If someone is angry with you:

  • Listen.
  • Listen to what they are saying.
  • Listen for the deeper truths.
  • Getting defensive does not help
  • Listening is the doorway through which love enters

If you are angry with someone:

  • Speak the truth with love – blame, name-calling and criticism are detrimental.
  • Talk it out without raising your voice
  • Don’t threaten- in any form: don’t threaten to leave, don’t threaten divorce – don’t threaten.
  • Don’t say: “you always/ you never” – speak to the situation at hand
  • Guard your words – once they are out, the damage is done

Remember:   You are not in a conflict to have your own way–to win

You are in a conflict for your relationship to win